Proverbs 5:18 Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth.

It is not how we fall in love but how we remain in love that is important. Some have a sweet courtship but a bitter marriage; it should not be the case. Marriage, as instituted by God, is intended for man’s happiness (Gen 2:18).

But a perverse generation does not understand love, sex and marriage. They are attracted by the body; that is sexual. They think they are in love. But it is lust they are after. Still, they get married. But they divorce at the first sign of trouble. Here, in this tiny nation, the divorce rate is almost 30%. And the median age at divorce for male is 42 and female 38. And the median duration of marriage for divorces is 10. It means that many marriages did not survive above 10 years and the young adults who are in the prime of their lives and career are most susceptible to quit the marriages.

It is not how much you both kissed and hugged each other during courtship that is beautiful but if you still hold hands, kiss and hug each other after years and years of marriages then that are sweet and beautiful. It is a beautiful sight to see two aged husband and wife holding hands in public. To this husband, the wife is just as beautiful as the day he married her and to this woman, her husband is still the same dashing young man.

Solomon warns his son against adultery by reminding him of the wife he has taken when he was young. He reminds his son that this woman is the wife of his youth. He is reminding him to remember the day he fell in love with that beautiful lady and the day he took her in marriage; never forget that day. And I like to add a note to husbands and wives: Display your wedding photos and the photos you have taken during the happy moments when you were young. A happy marriage is a blessing and delight worthy of rejoicing. Those happy moments should be shown to your children and teach them the valuable lessons of true love and marriage.

Boys and girls should be taught early in life that marriage is for life. Times and times again, Solomon repeats his warnings to his son about those strange women who would appear in his life and rock the marriage. He is telling his son that his wife will grow old and so is he. And there will always be younger and more beautiful women that will appear in his life – be it at work, in the church, or in the market places. He calls them strange women (Pro 2:16; 5:3,20; 6:24; 7:5). Strange women are women a married man has no business to be intimate with.

Let him that is married take delight in his wife, and let him be very fond of her, not only because she is the wife that he himself has chosen and he ought to be pleased with his own choice, but because she is the wife that God in His providence appointed for him: “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD” (Pro 18:22).

Young men and women need to learn that marriage is between two imperfect people who come together to make a perfect marriage. I am not perfect. My wife is not perfect. We have arguments and differences. Our children can see we are not the same and have differences. But they also see we are madly in love with each other.

We marry for love and it is love that must keep us together. Some think that it is only in fairy tales that the couples live happily ever after; they think that such marriages don’t exist in real life. They are wrong!

It takes a daily commitment and effort to make your marriage work. It takes lots of forgiving, forbearing, patience, kindness and most important, love. There is no magic wand you or anyone else can wave that will make your marriage perfect; it is you and your spouse.

The righteous man who fear God and trust His Word will condemn and avoid all forms of casual sex outside marriage, and will teach their children to avoid them just as Solomon taught his son.

To unmarried men who wish to marry: with great caution and be sure to find a woman who is truly worthy of marriage. And to the unmarried women who wish to marry: don’t fall for a man who only falls for your body but choose someone who will treat even the ugliest woman like a princess.

God commands husbands and wives to be yoke-fellows and rejoice with each other. Mutual delight is the bond of mutual fidelity: “Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth” (Pro 5:18).

Jimmy Lau

Psa 119:97  Oh how love I thy law! It is my meditation all the day.